Time for a little levity… Lifted from the UI horn studio web site, shamelessly adapted from a viral internet post on jazz band fines…
Orchestra Fines for Horn Players
Coming Late to rehearsal: $100
Coming Late to Performance: $500
Not Showing up at All: $400
Forgetting music: $50
Forgetting instrument: $100
Bringing wrong instrument: $150
Not noticing: $250
Not warming up: $50
Obnoxious show-off warm-up: $500
Playing highest note possible during warm-up: $107
Warming up with Principal Horn’s solos: Lethal Injection
Staring at Principal during solo: Burning at stake
Emptying water during Principal’s solo: Electrocution
Giving advice to principal after a clam: Hanging
Playing principal’